Future Self: Teen Zine vol. 5, part 3, Chapter 1: hope—light in the dark
Juliette Alvey
A nature show once described a certain bird behavior. Picture this: two birds, which look to be about the same size, fly around. One of the birds follows the other one closely and squawks loudly at it. Is it trying to scare the other bird away? Is it a male bird trying to attract a female bird? No, it is none of these things. It is in fact a fledgling bird (aka a teen bird) trying to follow the mother bird, making sure the mother bird does not leave it behind or ignore it.
Does this sound familiar to those of you who have teenagers in your life?
Teens inhabit the impossible in-between stage where they start to look like adults and can be trusted to have some independence, while in reality, they still depend on our guidance and are not quite ready to be on their own. Expectations for teens can be unfair because we want them to step into that new role of being responsible and independent, but we also want them to follow our rules and not leave the nest quite yet.
This unique stage of life is one that requires HOPE. The future is uncertain and they do not have a whole lot of life experience under their belts. But somehow they are expected to have a clear vision of what they want their future to look like.
There is a ton of pressure put on teens to have high standards for themselves: good grades, acceptance into a good college, a successful career, a spouse, and a family down the road. These are all perfectly healthy and good things to aspire to, but sometimes we are fooled into thinking that our child’s (and our) hope depends on these things.
The third part of the Future Self Teen Zine reminds us about what and who our future hope is in:
“It can be easy to think we can only hope in our own ability to navigate life’s challenges or to construct an idealized version of ourselves. But Jesus turned that logic upside down. It was only by suffering on a cross and willingly submitting to death that he gave each one of us a place in God’s Kingdom—the ultimate hope!” (p. 24).
None of us wish for our children or teens to suffer. But God tells us to take heart because it is precisely in the dark times (when we feel completely helpless by our own power) that hope really shines. The zine explains, “Hope is found in unexpected places… like in a still, soft whisper. Or in the tiny town of Bethlehem. Or in the ‘widowed’ and ‘orphaned’ and needy places in our lives” (p. 32). “And when you cannot hang on, know that in Jesus, hope is hanging on to you” (p. 31).
As we help our teens navigate life, it is important to point them not primarily to the prevention of problems and the path to success, but to the one who hangs on to them through the problems and through the failures. Hope is not found in the absence of trouble; it is found in the presence of Jesus, who promises us a place in his eternal kingdom.
